Question- ambient lighting- Grey / Black 12 pin connectors

hi, I bought an aftermarket ambient lighting system for my 2006 ford fusion. I even bought the cup holder ring to make it look more factory installed.

the problem I'm having is: to install this I will need to connect a grey 12 pin connector to a black 12 pin connector spot. does anyone know the difference between the grey 12 pin connector and the black 12 pin connector?

looking at the two, the only different I can see is the plastic notch at the bottom is placed in a different spot. everything else looks the same.

Is it okay to forced these two together or is there an adapter I need? please help.